Desirable Fulfillments

Greetings to you reader! Whatever is happening in your life at this moment, I want to tell you that your life is bigger than the needs and wants of this moment. That God provisioned the best gift of all for you through the sacrifice of His son Jesus. Perhaps you have trouble believing that. If so, I would like to also tell you that you’re not alone. While I believe wholeheartedly in the sacrifice of Jesus and the gift of eternal life it gave, I still have trouble believing that God could provision anything else for me. Despite this, I know that love makes no difference between these – that while Jesus’ death was the greatest gift of all, God wants to fulfill all our wants and desires when we’re focused on Him. So for myself and you reader, let’s pray that we can let go of this moment’s battles and think grandly to the eternal life that is available to us.

A Heart’s Desire for a Desirable Heart

For a long time I told myself “I’ll be fine alone.” Reflecting on the times that I told myself that, I do believe that I wasn’t lonely. I had some strange strengthen in my solitude. It wasn’t total apathy towards friendship or finding a girlfriend, I simply knew that either way, I would be okay. As I’ve grown older, I’ve started feeling differently. It would seem that loneliness creeps up on you. Within the last few years, I’ve found myself broken and desiring deep connection.

My desire for deep connection was something that triggered a move, and it helped me get more involved with church. It has made my ever growing faith stronger. Although, I still desire more. I desire companionship. I desire to share life with a woman. I desire to live faithfully with another who challenges me, wants to be challenged, and shares a vision of living for God. Do those desires seem noble? My explanation for their face value is because they come from my heart. My heart is starting to speak louder than anything else, but it hasn’t always.

So then, since Christ suffered physical pain, you must arm yourselves with the same attitude he had, and be ready to suffer, too. For if you have suffered physically for Christ, you have finished with sin. You won’t spend the rest of your lives chasing your own desires, but you will be anxious to do the will of God. You have had enough in the past of the evil things that godless people enjoy—their immorality and lust, their feasting and drunkenness and wild parties, and their terrible worship of idols.

1 Peter 4:1-3 NLT

When I told myself that I would be fine alone, my heart was hard. My flesh spoke louder than anything else, and so my actions reflected that. I indulged in whatever made me feel good and I let that rule my life. It was debauchery. I drank too much alcohol and looked at porn frequently. When I looked at women, it was through the lens of flesh, and my lust drove all interactions. Images of sink holes that are actively swallowing up the surface fill my mind as I try to describe the destructiveness of trying to fulfill those desires.

Let us walk properly, as in the day, not in revelry and drunkenness, not in lewdness and lust, not in strife and envy. But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts.

Romans 13:13-14 NKJV

My heart was hard; I hold evidence of that. I can see that as time went on, it has softened. When it was hard, I would watch the news and see the terrible things happening in the world and feel almost nothing. Now, sometimes I struggle to watch a TV show let alone the news. Its introspection will rattle my soul and my heart will respond. I can see bits of myself in all of it.

A Heart of Flesh

Then I will give them one heart, and I will put a new spirit within them, and take the stony heart out of their flesh, and give them a heart of flesh, that they may walk in My statutes and keep My judgments and do them; and they shall be My people, and I will be their God.

Ezekiel 11:19-20 NKJV

Only God can soften a heart. There are passages in the Bible that describe God’s authority over a heart’s hardness. I believe He has and continues to soften mine. As I have returned to Him, He has poured out His Spirit on me and given me a “heart of flesh” like it says in Ezekiel 11:19. The Bible often talks about the flesh and its sinful nature, such that Ezekiel passage can come off strange. Why would we want a heart of flesh? My flesh desired and lusted for things that weren’t Godly. My flesh put me into the position of being my own god, allowing me to provision for it and fulfill its desires.

So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.

Galations 5:16-17 NIV

Instead, I believe that Ezekiel passage is talking about a desiring heart. A heart that, like the flesh, wants and desires. While giving us new hearts God also poured out His Spirit, and that Spirit speaks to us new wants and desires that are contrary to our sinful nature. When we allow Jesus into our hearts and let Him be God over those things, we’re letting go and trusting that He will provision those things according to His plan for our lives.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

Galations 5:22-23 NIV

When we let God manage our heart, listening to the Spirit, we’ll see genuine proof of that through its fruit. Does this mean we’ll receive everything our heart desires? No. God has made promises to you, but He doesn’t owe you. Those promises declare His love for us, but they don’t give us assurance of them. He has already given the greatest gift of all: salvation from death. With that gift, we will be reconciled to Him.

If Jesus is our example, we shouldn’t forget His declaration of “Thy will be done.” Jesus surely desired that He should be relinquished from the duty to endure death upon the cross. Instead, He endured physical pain, torture, and death for God’s desire to provision life for us. So first and foremost, God’s wants and desires should be our priority. I believe when we’re walking with Him, He will speak those things into our hearts. Scripture, specifically much of the New Testament, is an important tool to validate those things. When our wants and desires are from God, we can trust that He will provision them for us.

Receipt

All of this I know, but does this mean I live by the Spirit only? No, I still struggle with the lusts of my flesh. I’m not perfect, and while I could never fulfill my new heart’s desires on my own, it doesn’t stop me from trying. I need to take a step back and act with the love that God has given me, and perhaps when I do that, I will be surprised by the result.

Written by Blaine Jester